I’ve had this post or thought in my head for a while now, but haven’t gotten around to writing it until now. I don’t even remember exactly what the conversation was about or how it came up, but I was talking with my boyfriend one day and he said to me, “well no it’s because you have a handicapped boyfriend” and to which I thought well, I suppose that’s true or partially true, but then I thought to myself, but aren’t we all handicapped?
I mean I think about everyone I know or have ever known or met in my life and no one is without some kind of handicap in their life. It’s just that it’s more noticeable with some what their handicaps are and with others, it isn’t always as noticeable. My boyfriend has driving restrictions because he has no left peripheral vision out of both eyes and is more or less partially blind due to an accident when he was younger so he has to rely on others to help him get places sometimes, but he can drive by himself fine within his limits or within the restrictions given and it’s more noticeable that he has that because it’s a physical thing, but we all have some kind of handicap.
My niece has cerebral palsy so her handicap is noticeable and others have physical handicaps like these that are easily noticed, but then there are the others of us like myself that have handicaps that are only noticed by those close to us or who know us really well. I have handicaps, but mine aren’t physical or that noticeable, my handicaps are more of an emotional, somewhat mental and psychological nature than physical or otherwise because I am handicapped from what I have been through in my life as others are handicapped by trauma or other things also.
I just found this interesting when thinking and pondering on this the other day to realize to myself that I’m handicapped just like anyone else and just like those with physical handicaps, but sometimes I wonder if having handicaps emotionally and otherwise could possibly be more damaging at times. I don’t mean to disregard other handicaps, it’s just I’ve thought of this before and sometimes wished that I could have suffered something physical rather than the emotional and such that I experience almost all the time it seems. It’s just that it seems harder to heal from the emotional, mental and psychological aspect of things than it would seem it is to heal from some of the physical things in life.
I often use to say when going through the initial pain, grief and healing after my divorce and then placing both my girls for adoption that I wished I could just deal with having a broken bone instead of what I dealt with and still do sometimes emotionally and otherwise, but really I don’t know that it would be any easier if I had a different handicap to deal with in my life. I know how to deal with and work through healing, grief and pain from the handicaps I have in my life now, but I don’t know if I’d know how to deal with a different handicap or someone else’s handicap in life.
Thinking of how we’re all handicapped in some way or another makes me wonder and think why we can’t be nicer to each other at times. We’re all suffering and all dealing with heartache and some form of a handicap or handicaps in our lives and we all can use someone to lean on so why aren’t we more compassionate with one other, I wonder sometimes. I know I’m guilty of not being as compassionate to others at times too so I’m talking and thinking out loud here and not trying to lecture or anything like that.