More on the Fun ‘Waiting’

Okay so I was looking around online today at some stuff on my computer earlier and the boyfriend was here and he all sees on something I was looking at where I’d written a sentence or something by my name on a website I go to about waiting so he starts asking me what I’m waiting for.

Well, I’m just like um, play dumb and oh, I don’t know what I’m waiting for because it caught me off guard that he saw that and started asking me questions, right.  Anyway, I didn’t know or wasn’t sure what to say, how to say or if I wanted to say, well, ya know, I’m waiting for you to get your butt in gear before I die or the milennium or the end of the world comes :p.

Anyway, so I didn’t say anything because it caught me off guard and I wasn’t sure what to say or how to respond, but then my boyfriend’s all well I’d like you to tell me what you’re waiting for because then maybe I could help you with what you’re waiting for…ya know, I’d like to help you with what you’re waiting for if I can and I was like hmm, I don’t know if you do or not and he looked at me weird and then the subject of discussion got changed.  Seriously though sometimes I wonder if he would want to help me with what I’m waiting for if he knew what it was and that it was about him taking a long time to propose or do anything with marriage, ya know.

I don’t know, I’m having one of my frustrated times, which I’m sure I’ll have many more of as time keeps going on here where I’m wondering if he’s even on the same page as me or am I being foolish and a stupid girl with stupid, unrealistic dreams that will never happen or come true with him or anyone else for that matter.  I mean am I just setting myself up to be crushed, shattered and get hurt like heck again or does he actually care and love me like I do him and enough to take the leap and the risk and propose to me sooner rather than later or not.

I’m in one of those moods where I feel like and wonder if anything even matters anymore as far as all of this is concerned, I mean do ya know what I mean.  I mean am I wasting my time waiting for nothing or am I waiting for something, I’m just rambling and frustrated and feeling insecure right now I suppose.  I don’t know plus I’m tired and need to get to bed so I can get up for class tomorrow, but I just sometimes feel like my boyfriend and I are on completely different pages when it comes to the marriage/proposal idea and possible timeline.

So, I’m totally feeling the whole thing with “men are from mars and women are from venus” idea right now and lately :p.

Blah, I just keep hoping and wishing for a miracle to drop on his head or suddenly show him the light, but sometimes it’s much more frustrating than others :p.

Well, I better hurry and get some sleep.  I hope everyone has a good one :).

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12 comments on “More on the Fun ‘Waiting’

  1. I was just wondering about doing a get together sometime and I’d thought of visiting you since you’re in AZ over spring break so I hadn’t really thought of anything big or specific yet.

  2. Oh well.. we need a get together this year. You, Me and Michelle could do something. Right Michelle??? LOL. What are you thinking? I wasnt very impressed with Vegas…

  3. LOL well, what’s funny to me is that just the other night we were talking and he says to me it’s easy to tell you really want to be a mom and that you’re the type who wants kids and would be a good mom.

    Yeah, I’m just going with the don’t say anything and wait because like you say, he’ll take his own sweet time anyway lol :p. Men always do take their own sweet time alright just like you say and they say women take a long time or that we’re complex sometimes ha, ha :p.

  4. I agree, probably partly where the age difference comes in. Tell him you want kids and your clock is ticking but you’re just frustrated because you have to wait till you’re married to have kids. Or dont say anything yet and let him take his time. He’ll take his time anyway, men always do, whether we like it or not.

  5. Well, I was just thinking about ideas and trying to figure out and decide what to do or if I want to do anything specific on my spring break so I was just wondering what you were doing :p.

  6. Well, I’ve told him that I’m not hiding anything from him and he knows I’m not. I also told him that I’ll tell him about it all in the future, but that I just don’t want to tell him right now, which he said he knows I’ll talk to him/tell him when I’m ready to tell him.

    But he understands and I’ve talked and said enough about stuff with him lately that he doesn’t feel like I’m hiding anything from him and he’s fine waiting for me to tell him in the future.

  7. I have only read this one post – sorry – but it sure sounds like the asking to help and your evasiveness to say what you were doing was making him feel you had something to hide from him.

  8. Thanks, Ragazza – I checked your blog out and liked it too :). I also do go out and do other things or focus on other things when I get frustrated like that to take my mind off it and him like you mentioned :).

  9. Yeah, I know – he is really great, which is why I’m still here and don’t want to pressure him or have a pressured proposal like you said, Christine :).

    By the way, Christine, what are you doing and where are you going to be in March…like the middle of March time?

  10. This is where the age difference comes in I think. I would always assume you are waiting for nothing.. hahahah. Except he seems really great.. I would just have fun with it… be cryptic… say you are waiting for all the peices to fit together. *wink* and then dont elaborate. The last thing you want is a pressured proposal…. that will never live up to the expectation. Love ya, girl.

  11. I so know how you feel. You know what I do when I’m in those moods? I go out and do something for myself to get my mind off of “HIM” and back on me. The last time this happened with a suitor….and my mind was all obsessed with him…I got tired of waiting around and I signed myself up for ballroom dancing! He is no longer in my life, but that’s the way it goes and was supposed to happen. I do have someone else in my life now…someone who pays attention. Good luck, enjoyed reading your blog.

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