Old friends popping up

Well, so I reconnected with one of my old friends from high school a while ago through the classmates website.  She and I have e-mailed and all and I don’t have a problem with her – she doesn’t know about my two girls yet though.

My problem is with another couple friends from high school that have either reconnected with me or want to reconnect.  See with one of these old high school friends, I was glad to hear from her and get her e-mail, but then she said something in her e-mail that triggered me.

Of course, how would she know when she’s been out of touch with me for so long, but she said in her e-mail to me so you know I’m married with two kids living in this place now right.  Then she continued on with her e-mail and said well, I better have a husband if I have two kids though right ha ha.  I was so triggered and kind of upset by that because I was like oh yeah like no one ever has two kids without a husband and cause she said it joking like no big deal and all because that’s how she sees it and that’s how I’ve seen it most of my life too.

The thing is that I don’t see it quite that way now since I have two girls and I don’t have a husband nor did I have a husband when I had either of my girls.  I mean, of course, my girls are with their families growing up and not with me, but still that kind of rubbed me the wrong way when she said ha, ha, I better have a husband if I have two kids.  I mean I would never say that to someone, but I come from a totally different world and perspective now too because of having had and placed my two girls for adoption and all.

It’s just that when I read that part of her e-mail, it triggered me and now I haven’t been able to calm down enough to write the fake nicey letter back to her.  I want to be like HELLO do you even think about what you’re saying before you write it – what’s wrong with having two kids and no husband ha ha – lots of people have that happen ya know – geez.  

Oh and now I really don’t know if I want to ever tell her about my girls because of that comment – I mean it makes me that much more hesitant to share with her at some point, ya know.  My hesitancy to share with this friend with her ignorant comment in turn causes me to feel more hesitant to share with my other friend I’ve reconnected with that I wanted to share with at some point because the one I’ve reconnected with, A, and the one with the ignorant comment, H, are like really close friends too.  So, if I tell A, she might tell H when I don’t feel too sure about letting H know in regards to her ignorant comment in her e-mail to me.

Man, it’s times like these that sometimes I feel like maybe old high school friends that you lose contact with should stay lost.  I don’t know, it’s almost harder in some ways to reconnect with old high school friends that connect with new friends who get it.

Oh and then there’s my old best girl friend from high school that just tried to call me just the other day.  Man, that girl has got some issues with codependency on me in a bad way or something.  I’m telling you guys, this girl that was my best friend in high school she’s almost like an stalker ex-boyfriend of sorts sometimes.

I’m tellin ya, I totally attract the crazies, even some crazy girls sometimes.  I mean I went on a mission for the LDS church back from 98 to 2000 and this ex best friend, An, wrote me while I was on my mission.

The thing that’s weird here is that I decided not to come home in February and to stay a month longer and my ex best friend, she totally freaked out on me in a letter she wrote to me.  She was all you can’t stay another month, I’ve been waiting for you to come back home all this time so we can go back out dancing and to the clubs again.  Oh and she was all you can’t do this to me after all this time I’ve waited for you to come home and so on.  

I don’t know about you, but that kind of creeped and weirded me out because I felt like I was getting some letter from a guy wanting me to hurry and come home to him except it was a girl that was suppose to be my best friend.  Anyway after my ex best friend weirded out on me like that when I was on my mission, I wrote her and told her I didn’t think it was a good idea for us to be friends or write anymore.  Once again she wrote me back and totally freaked out on me so I felt like I was having to break up with a weird boyfriend and it was a weird best girl friend.

Anyway, after I came home from my mission, I tried to be friends with her again and it got weird again so I ended it again.  Then since that every once in a while she still calls me to let me know what her current phone number or address is in case I want to call or hang out with her – weird considering how the friendship ended and everything ya know.  Okay and then there was once or twice after the time after my mission I tried to give her another chance and be friends with her again and each of those times things went weird again and I had to end it again those times too.  So, yeah, I’ve been done with her and giving her a chance at being friends for a long time now and yet she still tries to call or mail me letters and Christmas cards.

Oh and then some of her letters and this one Christmas card she sent, they had some weird stuff in them too.  I mean I hadn’t heard from her forever and was moving on with my life when I got this letter on my doorstep from her one day where she told me that she knew I probably didn’t care and didn’t like/love her anymore, but that she had to stop dwelling on the whole thing and let it go so she could be a better person.  She went on and on in this letter to me and tried to put me on all kinds of guilt trips and manipulate me into calling her and giving her a chance to be my friend again.  That was another creepy one.

Then in this last Christmas card I got from her, she was all I know you don’t care about me, blah, blah, blah, but I still care about you and wanted you to know and wish you a Merry Christmas.  Oh and she also said in her Christmas cards and letters, I don’t understand what I did wrong and why you won’t be my friend, but I still care about you even though I know you don’t care about me – hello, weirdo.

Okay so now you’ve got the history of me and this ex best girl friend of mine from high school and how she’s been trying to manipulate and guilt me into being her friend again every time after I’ve ended the friendship with her.  So, back to what I was saying about her calling me just a couple days ago.

Okay, so she called me a couple days ago and my Dad answered the phone because I was busy and unable to come to the phone, which I really was.  I wasn’t just avoiding her, I was really busy at the time she tried to call me too.  Now, get this, this girl has some nerve, I tell ya.

She called and gave this message to my Dad to tell me that she ran into a guy from high school that I use to have a crush on.  She also found out that this guy from high school that I use to have a crush on was still single now like me.  Can you guess why she called yet lol.

She wanted to know if I wanted her to set me up on a blind date with this old high school crush.  When my Dad told me this, I was like are you kidding me???  The weird ex best girl friend from high school, who I don’t even really consider to be a friend anymore and haven’t talked to or associated with in ages wants to know if I want HER to set me up on a blind date???

Um, can we say I don’t think so weird girl ex friend person.  I mean, first of all, I don’t want anything to do with this girl, she’s got some issues and that would be really awkward to talk to her to have her set me up on a blind date and even more awkward if the blind date didn’t work out.  Second of all, I don’t really want to be set up on a blind date, least of all by this weird girl person.  Third of all, I don’t like blind dates, I don’t like this girl and I probably wouldn’t like my old high school crush now either.  I’m not even sure what old high school crush she was talking about because she didn’t give a name, but all of my high school crushes I can think of are not ones I’d want to hook up or reconnect with either.

Besides all that, I feel like she’s probably just trying to use the tactic of luring me out to try to get me to be her friend again with the option of being set up on a blind date with some guy.  I think she’s just trying to use this as another way to manipulate or guilt or intrigue me into wanting to talk to her again and it ain’t gonna happen.  No way, nu uh, not gonna happen.

I may be curious about who the guy is and what not, but the risks of having to talk to this weird girl, who use to be my best friend in high school, and everything are too high.  It’s definitely not worth it, in my opinion, to call and talk to her to see who the guy is besides the fact that the way I see it if this old high school crush of mine actually wanted to see or know about me, he could find out for himself without my ex best friend trying to set us up on a blind date, ya know what I’m sayin here.

So, yeah, that’s been the latest with old friends from the past popping up and trying to reconnect with me.  I think I prefer new friends most of the time who actually get it, get me and who I am now more than some of these old high school friends do.  


4 comments on “Old friends popping up

  1. She’s not gay or bi, she’s straight and married with children.  The thing is more that she had me filling the position of a sister she never had and such. Like I said in the post, she has codependency issues.  I, myself, am a recovering codependent, but she hasn’t recognized her issues yet.

    She continues to live in the past and doesn’t try to get to know the me in the present. She just keeps living in the past and I don’t care to dwell or live in the past.  Also, if I ever try to talk to her, she uses guilt and manipulation tactics on me, which I don’t appreciate because that is just wrong to use guilt and manipulation on a person to try to get them to be your friend.

  2. I hate to break this to you, but it is blatently obvious from reading this that a) she was/is in love with you and b) you subconsciously know this and it scares you.

    What about her being gay/bi threatens you? You should honestly this about this. Maybe her being around made/makes you have to face the part of you that you do not want to. I am sure you are not gay, but everyone has the potential to have slight attractions to the same gender. Hers, for you, is strong.

  3. Hail Satan!! 666!


    So, Anne.. I know you dont care about me.. but I still care about you.

    That is why I stalk your blog every day. hahaha!

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