From Sunday, April 23, 2006


Sitting here thinking, pondering, when I should be in bed asleep already. I have to get up in 5-6 hours from now for church.

Anyway, I finished watching a movie a little while ago that put me in this wistful, thinking mood. It was a romantic comedy with a "happily ever after" ending, you know the type. If you're like me, you really like those kinds of movies, but at the same time, it can cause you to be wistful and ponder things and your life and wonder where your guy is that complements you.

I'm just sitting here pondering and feeling wistful for that day when I'll finally meet and fall in love again, but this time with someone worthy of me and my time. Someone so much better and wonderful than my ex-husband and all my past loves and guys that I've been involved with, but then again – I don't think it takes much for a guy to be better than the guys I've been involved with in my past, ya know. I mean, the guys I was involved with in my past were all pretty low scummy types, ya know, so anyone from now on has got to be better than the guys from my past the way I see it.

Well and I know there's good and decent guys out there still, but it just seems they're harder to find nowadays. I know there's a good, decent guy out there worthy of me and my time, but I just haven't found him yet so I'm being wistful right now, thinking of him, whoever and wherever he may be.

Wondering about this guy out there somewhere and what he's like and what it will be like when we finally meet and are in each other's lives. Wistfully thinking and wondering if he's thinking about me too or if this guy, whoever he is, ever wonders about me, the girl he's going to marry or if perhaps he already knows me and I'm the one who still hasn't realized who he is.

See, I'm thinking and pondering too much when I should be asleep so I bid you good night and I'll take the rest of my thoughts and wonderings to bed with me to be in my dreams…