Did ya know…

…apparently I’m a Princess ūüôā lol.¬† I got a birthday present and card from my 19 mo old’s parents earlier today that says I’m a princess anyway ;).

They sent me a book that looks good – the kind of book I would like called “Princess Academy”.¬† I’ve never heard of it before, but it sounds good from what I’ve looked at and read about the book so far.¬† It’s a book that’s about fantasy – yeah I know duh – never would have guessed that with the name “Princess Academy”.¬† It’s a book that’s a youth book or something like that, but Harry Potter was for young readers/youth too and the Harry Potter books are pretty good – at least I think they are.

Anyway so that made my day to get a birthday present and card from my 19 month old’s parents today :).¬† I also got my Cars soundtrack – woo, woo – “Life is a Highway” is on myspace page now and it was on repeat in my CD player in my car today.¬† If you couldn’t guess that song¬†is one of my favorites – I also have some others I like on the Cars soundtrack too though :D.¬† Oooh and I also got my other book, “Eragon”, in the mail today too.

Yep, so today was a package day for me – whee :).¬† My Dad and I are probably going to go see X-men 3 tomorrow afternoon and then scope out the coolest fireworks for the 4th of July :D!!!¬† Of course, we get to go see X-men 3 and get fireworks because my mom will be gone all day tomorrow – YAY so we don’t have to bring her along and have her be whiney or moody¬†plus she doesn’t want to see X-men 3 anyway.

I’m psyched to see X-men 3 though.¬† I’ve been dying to see it ever since it came out and pestering my parents and family and friends to get someone to go with me :p.¬† A couple of my friends were talking about us going to see it, but then plans changed, life happened so I was left looking for someone else to see it with.¬†

I tried to get my mom to let us go see X-men 3 on my birthday last week, but she wouldn’t so we saw Cars instead.¬† Don’t get me wrong though, Cars was great.¬† I just wanted to see X-men 3 too, but my mom wouldn’t go so now my Dad and I are going to probably go see it tomorrow ūüôā – YAY!

That’s my exciting life for now lol.¬† I did have a really good day today though :D.¬†

Hope all’s well with everyone else.

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Note on Search Terms – On Soapbox!

Okay, I’m weird, I know.¬† So, I look at my blog stats and what search terms¬†people use that bring them to my blog and there’s some pretty interesting search terms that people use.

My note here is in reference to the ‘sick’ terms people use like this one for example…

something nasty to see on girls or possibly this one…

A girls Body photos for 12 yr olds…

So, my note to you people/freaky weirdos in my book who use search terms like those –

My blog does NOT contain sick, freaky, weird and disgusting things like those that you’re searching for so go search somewhere else.

My blog is¬†NOT porn friendly nor am I – I detest and loathe¬†porn with a passion¬†and most people¬†especially guys¬†who look at it – it’s all tied to¬†some very bad¬†past personal experiences with my ex-husband,¬†some ex-boyfriends¬†and abuse etc., but porn and I are¬†NOT friends so I do not like weirdos like you who put those search terms in the computer!

I am very anti-porn and so is this blog so no need to look here for what you want. 

Thank you – I’m done with being on my soapbox and my vent/note¬†to the weirdos now.

What’s up with these guys…

…calling all us girls, “baby, baby, baby”.¬† I don’t know about you, but the last time I checked I was 29, which is far from being a baby :p.

I know I’ve read recently on my friends blogs about being called ‘baby’ by a guy or guys and hating it, but I hadn’t had it happen to me since a while ago until within the past day or two.¬† I swear if you want people to send you messages, all you gots to do is put up a picture of yourself online¬†and they’ll all come running.

Well all the freaky guys will come running anyway.¬†¬†So, okay, I haven’t put pictures of myself up online for a long time and for good reason, but I decided to put some pics of myself up¬†just the other day and now all the freaks are coming out of the woodwork again.¬†¬†Now I’m contemplating taking my pictures back down again…

Anyway, I’ve been¬†getting messages from these freaks that¬†have seen my pics saying ‘Hey, baby, you’re¬†way cute.¬† We¬†should go hang out sometime’.¬† Or ‘Well, hello there cutie.¬†How are you?’ or¬†‘Hey, baby, I just¬†had to write to say Hi cause you’re so totally hot’ or ….ya get the picture,¬†right –¬†after reading these I, of course,¬†find myself inclined to *gag, puke, hurl*.¬†

Also after reading these messages, I find myself contemplating taking down some or all of my¬†‘way cute, hot, etc.’ pictures.¬† Man, like I don’t have enough freaks¬†foaming at the mouth when they see me in person – now I get messages from them online too – ick.

Well and¬†on¬†my blogs/sites, I’ve made it clear, I thought that I’m not looking to hook up with anyone right now.¬† I only want to be friends, but of course, these freaks don’t understand what the word ‘friends’ means.¬†¬†

I¬†feel like going to some of them and saying can you see here on a profile where it says I’m only interested in friends?¬† Do you know what it means to be just friends?¬† Would you like¬†me to look¬†‘friends’ up in the dictionary and spell the definition out for you freaky weirdos?!

It’s like say friends now spell it now tell me what it means, now think about it and tell me do I want to talk to you or hook up??¬† Yeah I know it’s hard for¬†the freaky weirdos to use their brains sometimes, but geez man, if they’d use their brains once in a while, it’d make things¬†a little easier for me – ha.¬†¬†

Yeah I know since when and why would any freaky weirdos want to help make things a little easier for nice, decent, normal girls like myself – blah *rolls eyes*.¬† Okay, vent over, you get the picture, right – well especially if you’re a girl or a decent guy.

But if you’re a freaky weirdo, you won’t understand¬†any of these things I’m typing here lol –¬†big surprise there :p.¬†

Memories…

I was just sitting here browsing through myspace page, and some other blogs catching up on things when I decided to change some stuff around on myspace page. 

So, I was browsing through some music videos on myspace to decide what one I wanted to put on myspace page and then some memories and emotions hit.¬† I don’t know why I connect them or what it is, but I was watching the music video/listening to matchbox 20’s song Bent and it just hit.

All of a sudden I was feeling like I was on a trip down memory lane and remembering my ex husband and all that fun and not fun stuff about our marriage and relationship.¬† For some reason, that Bent song by matchbox20 always held some significance in our relationship and it wasn’t a good significance either.

Just like that song mentions, my ex husband and I ended up bent and I feel/have felt like that a lot since him.¬† “Can you help me I’m bent…I’m so scared that I’ll never get put back together…” or something like that are some of the words in the song and man if that doesn’t say how I feel/felt and have to work through that feeling a lot in my past especially – I don’t know what does.

But at the same time besides the hard emotional part of it all that the song brings back to me from my memories, it also brought back memories of how good things were in the brief time that things were good with us.¬† So, it brought back good and bad memories of my ex husband, it was a major bittersweet rush of memories and emotion that just seemed to suddenly surface when I was watching the music video and listening to that song.¬† I don’t know why it brought those things to mind, but it did.

Such a bittersweet rush of emotions and some of it an ache and a longing for what could have been if things had been different.¬† Of course, we all know that’s a waste of time and I don’t usually think or dwell on that, but sometimes it resurfaces out of the blue and this time this song was the one that brought it back.

I just love having a past to deal with and that comes back to ‘haunt’ me so to speak at times, ya know :p.¬† Ah, well, that’s life and I have to pull myself out of my memories every time and remember that it’s all in the past now and I really am in a much better place now for myself and with my life :).

I just hate when these emotions and memories from the past that were seemingly forgotten suddenly surface like that :p.

PSYCHE!!! :)

Ha, ha – I had all of you thinking as well as myself that I was going to go to the dentist and find that I had one or more cavities today.

But guess what…chicken butt lol – okay no seriously…there were no cavities!!!¬† I was all ready for having my teeth drilled and all that¬†whole ordeal and then there were no cavities – YAY :D.

So,¬†I still haven’t had my first cavity in life yet.¬† My no¬†cavity streak is still alive¬†for the time being.¬† I was so happy to hear the dentist tell me there were no cavities.

It was just a bunch of¬†plaque and tartar buildup and stuff.¬†¬†Well and I hadn’t¬†had a dental checkup for 18 months¬†so yeah – bad Anne ūüôā lol.¬† So, my¬†teeth are feeling somewhat better now.

I still have to make sure to floss etc.¬†though¬†and go back to the dentist sooner than 18 months from now next time.¬† So, I got some¬†unexpected good news from the dentist and didn’t have to spend an arm and a leg on¬†having my teeth drilled since¬†luckily there were no cavities after all :).¬† So,¬†it was a happy day for me…again :D.¬†

I know – it’s a miracle another happy, good day for me, which makes what…4 happy, good days in a row – well¬†and¬†a little over a week of good times overall now.¬† There’s something wrong with that¬†lol – I don’t know how to handle this many¬†happy, good days in a row and these many good things¬†going on with me lately.

I also went out to lunch with my friend today before the dentist and she’s¬†working on getting me a birthday present still.¬† So, the birthday celebration stuff¬†is still coming…:).

Okay enough of my happy ranting and raving for¬†now.¬† I hope all’s well with everyone¬†else :).

All is right…again :)

It seems like a lot has happened since I last wrote in here and I guess in a way it has.  It just seems like it's been longer than a couple days since I last wrote an entry here because of everything that's happened recently.

So, first, on Thursday night, I went out with my friends and had ice cream.  We sat and talked about life and everything for a while.  They gave me two discount movie tickets for my birthday present – YAY :D.  They're such cool friends.

Then on Friday, I got a call in the afternoon on my cell phone, which I wasn't expecting cause usually no one calls me on my cell phone.  I mean I don't give my cell number out to many people cause I've had to change my cell number quite a few times cause of weird guys that wouldn't stop calling so I've stopped handing out my cell number to everyone lol :p.

So, back to the unexpected phone call, it was from one of the places I applied to for a job and they called me in for an interview Friday afternoon.  They offered me a job in the cash office at the retail store because I've had experience with that position before, but I ended up not getting that position because they want someone who's going to be there in that position more long term.  I'm only looking for something for about 2 months before I move out and go to school in the fall so they still offered me a job, but it was a cashier job instead of the cash office job, but I'm okay with that cause it gives me some money and it's a better job than working at that pet store would have been :).

Besides having my job interview and getting a job that I should be starting later this coming week, I also got my ears pierced and run errands and stuff on Friday.  I tried to pierce my ears once before when I was 18, but I had a bad experience with it so for the past 11 years, I haven't had pierced ears, but I went and got them pierced on Friday so I'm giving having pierced ears another try now.  Hopefully, my ears won't get infected or have problems this time like they did when I was 18, guess we'll see.

Anyway, Friday was a busy, good day for me and so was Saturday – I know – Wow – two busy, good days in a row.  On Saturday, I got all my cleaning and laundry done and then made dinner too :).  I've just been having a really good weekend and well this whole past week was really great overall :D.

Although I do have to go to the dentist for my routine checkup tomorrow afternoon and I'm not excited for that.  The dentist will probably scold me for not flossing as much as I should etc. and I'm not too excited to find out the verdict on my teeth from the dentist this time because I'm pretty sure I have a cavity.  I might have more than one cavity, but I'm pretty sure I have at least one.  My first cavity or cavities in 29 years.  Pretty good that I've gone 29 years without ever having a cavity and having to have my teeth drilled and get a filling though, huh :).

Oh and they sang Happy Birthday to me at church today in the class of little kids I teach – whee lol :).  Also there's one of the other ladies in my church that said she's going to come by and bring me something for my birthday and another friend of mine in the neighborhood that lives just down the street from me is going to take me out to lunch for my birthday tomorrow or sometime this week :).  So, the birthday gifts and celebrations just keep going on with me so far :D. 

I got some fun stuff for myself for my birthday besides piercing my ears with the gift card from my 3 yr old and parents too.  With the gift card, I got one of the books I wanted, Eldest by Christopher Paolini, Kelly Clarkson's CD, a Mary J. Blige CD, and Disney's Lady and the Tramp on DVD that I didn't have in my collection yet :).  Then when I came home later Friday night, I went online and ordered the book, Eragon by Christopher Paolini, which is the first book and then Eldest is the second book in this series and the Disney Cars soundtrack and used my own money to buy them.  I should be getting that book and the Cars soundtrack in the mail later this week so I'm excited about that. 

I also went to the library and got to spend time there having fun and browsing books.  I checked out a couple more of Kathy Reichs mystery books that I'm excited to read as soon as I'm done with this other book I'm finishing up :D.  I'm planning on going to the store with my Dad later this week to pick out some cool fireworks to do on the 4th of July too.  Hopefully, I'll be able to get off work from this new job I'll be starting by 8 or 9 pm on the 4th of July so I can do fireworks :).

So, life's still going pretty good and I'm feeling pretty happy and psyched about the future lately :).

The Princess and the Hair

Okay, so I'm doing a spin on "The Princess and the Pea" fairy tale story.  We all know the Princess and the Pea story, right?  The one where to see if she's a real princess they put a pea at the bottom of this huge pile of mattresses to see if she feels it so they can prove she's a true princess.  Of course, she feels the pea through all these mattresses and proves she is a Princess – well sometimes I feel like I live that story but my version is the Princess and the hair because it doesn't matter where a piece of hair is on me – I will always find it.

I've always thought it's the weirdest thing, but if there's a strand of hair on my back, I feel it and get it off.  If there's the tiniest strand of hair anywhere on me, I feel it, find it and get it off of myself.  I cannot stand having stray strands of hair on me tickling my arm or anything so sometimes I've thought of comparing how I am with these stray strands of hair to how that Princess in the story was with the little pea.

I don't know if that makes sense, but I've always thought of that analogy/comparison with the hair thing with myself.  On another note, I get to go to the dentist next week – yay me – whee :p.  Um, I'm being sarcastic here if ya couldn't guess – I hate going to the dentist, but then again who really likes going to the dentist anyway, ya know.

I'm not really that excited to go to the dentist next week because I've been having a little toothache this week and come to the conclusion that I think it's very likely I have my first cavity.  I'm not excited about this at all.  I was doing really good – no cavities for 29 years and now I think I have my first.  I'm pretty sure I have at least one cavity, but it's possible that there could be more than just the one, who knows.  I guess we'll find out when I go to the dentist next week.

I've never had a cavity or had a tooth drilled etc. like they do with cavities so I'm a little nervous and freaked about what the verdict will be on my teeth after I go to the dentist next week.  I wish we didn't have to have cavities – I keep trying to wish away the toothache and likelihood that it is a cavity, but it's not working :p – dang it, I don't wanna have my mouth drilled – aah. 

Oh, well, that's life, I suppose.  I'm just hoping it's not really bad whatever the dentist finds when he checks my teeth this next week.  Hopefully, the dental visit won't turn out to be really bad and it'll be okay – whatever he finds – I hope, I hope, I hope.

My Birthday was Great :)!!!

My birthday ended up being a success.  I don't know how or what exactly happened, but my mother was decent and didn't ruin my birthday after all :D.

I had a good birthday too.  I went up to this big Gateway mall and walked around with my family.  We went to see the movie, "Cars", which was sooo much fun and it sooo totally rocked.  I LOVE that movie – it was so much fun – love Pixar – love them!!!

After the movie, we walked around this cool mall some more and I saw a sale in a bath and body works store there, which is one of my favorite stores so we went in there for a while.  I got some bath and body works stuff on sale for part of my birthday presents ūüôā and then we went to this great chocolate dessert store – Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory – and I got some yummy desserts :D.  Then we walked the mall some more and it was cool cause it's kind of an outdoor mall, well except when you're in the stores, of course, ;).

They have this fun little fountain place where you can run around and get wet that we watched the kids playing at for a while.  They also do a musical fountain show type thing that's kind of cool there that we saw.

Then when we were gonna head back to the car, I saw a bookstore, Barnes and Nobles and took off to go play there for a while before we left :).  I mean we all know how much I love bookstores, libraries and everything – like bookstores are as cool as cool chocolate dessert stores to me ūüėÄ hee, hee.

So, after we hung out at the bookstore for a while, we walked around the mall a little more and then left to head for home.  On the way home, we decided to stop and check out this place called 'The Aquarium' cause we thought maybe it was an aquarium and it ended up being a pet/fish store, but it was a pretty cool store.  We walked around in the store and looked at tons of fish and a few other kinds of animals – reptiles etc., but they had a really good variety/selection of fish – it was a cool pet store so we spent a while in there looking around before we went home.

Then on the way home, we called and ordered pizza.  So, not long after we got home, the pizza came and we ate pizza and our goodies from the yummy dessert place and then decided to watch the movie, "The Hulk".  So, that was my birthday :).

I did also receive a few phone calls from friends, neighbors etc. wishing me a Happy Birthday.  I also received an unexpected card and gift in the mail from a friend of mine :).  And I got a few e-cards/e-mails from other friends and family wishing me a Happy Birthday also.  I had a friend come over and bring me some candy and wish me a Happy Birthday and a couple other friends are taking me out for ice cream or something on Thursday night for my birthday so it's been a good one :D.

Oh and one of the e-cards/e-mails I got wishing me a Happy Birthday was from my 18 mo old's mom and family :D.  I was really touched to get that from them and know they were thinking of me and wishing me a Happy Birthday today :).  Oh and I've got my gift card from my 3 yr old and parents that I'm thinking I'm gonna use some of it and go buy myself a couple birthday presents later this week :).  I've got some things/ideas in mind of what I'd like to get myself with their gift card.

I'm also hyped up about some new authors and books I've found that I like and am interested in reading/buying now.  I've discovered Kathy Reichs, who was recommended to me by Tara, so it's her fault that I'm hooked on Kathy's books now lol ;).  Seriously, Tara, Kathy and her books rock so thanks for the recommendation :).  Also while browsing the bookstore today, I found another author/book series about dragons and mythical things, which I love to read about those things, that I'm excited to read and have on my list now too.  Oh and I found another author to add to my list to check out from browsing the bookstore also :).

I had a cute guy say Hi to me and check me out while we were at the mall today too, which is always nice to have happen every once in a while, ya know :).  Ya, so life's pretty good, my birthday was even better than I had hoped for and I feel great!  I'm even more hopeful, positive and determined about life, being able to achieve my goals, that everything will work out okay somehow and that I will end up with a good guy one day possibly sooner than I think :D.

So, I've definitely had an awesome day for my birthday.  It's helped me to refocus and feel rejuvenated in many ways about life and things I was having a hard time with and feeling down about recently :).  I'm so glad that there's ups in life when you need them and not always downs :D.

I think I'm gonna like being 29 and I think this year may just be one of my best years yet – guess we'll see ;).

Happy Birthday to Me :)!!!

Yep, it's my birthday today.  I'm another year older, another year's gone by and here I am on my birthday again.

I can't say I'm 28 anymore, now I'm 29 – an odd number, hmm, what fun :).  I hope that doesn't mean it's going to be an odd year lol ;).

Anyway, I'm suppose to go have fun today for my birthday so hopefully I will and my mother won't ruin my birthday with her moodiness.  She's been on one of her moody and 'poor pity me' kicks lately so I'm hoping I can have fun and not let her spoil my day for me with her moodiness :p.

Well, here's to hoping the day will go good and my mom won't tick me off to no end like usual.  Yeah, so here's to hoping it's really a happy birthday :D, which it will be, but it wouldn't be as annoying if my mother would put herself in a better mood :p.

Ah, well, that's life – Happy Birthday to me ūüėÄ – I'm not letting her or anyone else ruin it for me so :p.

Where have all the good men gone?

As you can see by the title of this entry, I'm feeling frustrated with men recently.  Or should I say lack of men as in lack of good men and having my feelings reinforced of there being few and far between of the good kind of men I hope to find.

Yeah, I'm happily single, but I have my times where I wish I could have a decent prospect in the dating scene.  I have my times where I would like to find a decent, good man to be with and it seems to be getting harder to find him lately.

Okay so this recent bout of frustration with men and all was brought on because I went to a dance this past Friday night and was very unimpressed with the quality of guys there.  I felt very out of place and it seemed rather obvious to me that the guys at that dance were not on my level and I was disgusted with the lack of ambition among the guys I talked to there.

Of course, I've been somewhat disgusted with the lack of ambition among most guys I've talked with or know for quite some time now though.  I just don't understand these guys that are all wandering around lost with no direction in their life.

Given I had my time where I was lost wandering around trying to find direction in my life, but I found my direction – some of these guys seem to never find a direction for themselves in their lives.  I can say that I understand more now why good, worthwhile guys were turned off by me when I was just taking up space, wandering aimlessly with no direction in my life because now I feel that way about guys I meet who have no direction and seemingly no ambition of any kind in their life.

It's just that I'm about to turn 29 – ack, I know and I'm looking for something more substantial and concrete in a guy that's worthwhile.  I'm looking for a guy who's secure in many ways about themselves and their lives and who can or could provide or help provide for a family.  None of these no direction wandering guys are secure in much of anything nor can they or could they in the near future provide or give much help in providing for a family so that doesn't impress me much, ya know.

I'm also more picky about some things with guys than others, but that is my choice.  It's just that at this dance on Friday night, I danced and talked with some guys and none of them really seemed to be secure or have much direction or ambition in life.

Well, first off, I talked with this guy who's just kind of passing through town, not going to school and hasn't decided if he wants to look for a job or not so he's just bumming around – so unimpressive to me.  Then this other guy hadn't been to school since he graduated high school in 97, wasn't going to school and didn't think he'd be going anytime soon and all he was doing was working a maintenance job at a warehouse – so impressive.  Could you tell I was being a little sarcastic there – ha ha.  Then this other guy wanted to write a column for a newspaper on opinions – which was a step up from the other two, but still I wasn't all that impressed by that – being a writer isn't that stable of a job.  Well and another reason I wasn't impressed was because that hopeful writer guy was like only 18 or 19 – way too young for me.

Then I saw or ran into quite a few guys from my past there – hate when that happens and they were all the same as the last time I'd seen them.  They were all still wandering, no direction and not sure what they wanted to do with life and they all still wanted to hang out with me – leechy kind of guys that have no direction in life that I don't like to hang out with at all.

There was also another guy who came to the dance with a few people and he came up to me like as soon as he walked in the door and was like don't I know you.  I was like yeah I think you do and then we figured out we'd hung out at a dance in the past and he was all well, we can hang out again so he and I and this other girl and guy and little group were hanging out at the dance.  Well it got weird when a slow song came on and this girl in the group got asked to dance by some guy and she said no I'm on a date and then she and this guy who came and talked to me and said hey we can hang out again here went to slow dance.  So apparently this guy who all walks over to me right when he walks into the dance and talks to me and says we should hang out again like the other time we hung out at a dance was there at the dance with this girl on a date.  Now I just thought that was weird.

I mean, do you know what I mean.  I just think it's weird to take someone on a date to a dance like that in the first place because most people go there to hang out and meet people not to go on a date with someone they already know and like kind of thing.  Then the really weird thing to me is why was he all coming over to me, to talk to me and invite me to hang out and everything like it was so cool to see me again and hang out with me when he was there on a date with this other girl.  I mean that's just weirdo city to me, ya know.

So, anyway, that was my "fun" experience at this dance on this past Friday night that brought about this frustration vent about guys.  Now ya know why I'm wondering where all the good guys have gone and where they're hiding after hearing about my experience at this dance this past Friday night.

It's just so irritating to me when I've gone through everything I have in my life and recently received my Associates degree after working and keeping at it for a long time and these guys don't seem to care much about college education or stable jobs/careers in life, ya know.  Well and here I am getting ready to go off to college again this fall and pursue my Bachelors in Social Work and then my Masters so I can become a licensed social worker and hopefully one day also become a Psychologist with a PhD -Doctorate degree and these guys are doing nothing. 

They're only working maintenance in warehouses or not even going to school or working – sometimes it almost seems like they're waiting around for a free ride from a more ambitious girl like myself to come along and save them from having to take responsibility, get direction and/or find a stable job etc. in life.  I don't understand why these guys don't have more direction or a better job and why don't they go to college.  I place so much importance personally on college education and so many guys are like college is a waste of time and money – augh.

Then, of course, I've broken up with my recent ex boyfriends because they've had no direction, been lazy, been mama's boys, had no college education or placed no importance on it and so on.  Of course, there were lots of other factors in these recent break ups, but those were also key factors as well as the fact that these exes of mine wanted a free ride off of me and I wasn't going to give it to them.  They freakin wanted me to be the sole breadwinner for the home and work all the time, while they stayed home and played and spent all the money I'd earn.  In my view of things, that is not how it's suppose to work, the guy is suppose to be the sole provider for the family and when necessary the girl helps out, but she's not suppose to do it all herself – although it seems that's what everyone thinks nowadays at times – that's not how I view it, how I was brought up or what I'm looking for in a relationship/marriage either.

Anyway, it seems that the good men are becoming few and far between nowadays so I've just been having one of my frustrating times with that – blah de blah :p.